Asking for Help is Never Easy – With Gratitude

January 16 2023

I’ve had to ask for help so many times throughout these years, I feel like folks have had enough of me! But at the urging of friends and after working through even more embarrassment, guilt and shame, I’m asking for help.

If I could get Thomas’s orthodontist bill paid off, I would be able to afford a car payment.
During a break between storms on the evening of January 2nd, the roads were clear and it had stopped snowing.

I decided it would be okay to take Thomas (my 17-year-old) to a previously scheduled evening appointment.

While Thomas was in his appointment, it began to snow. We were nearly home when I lost control of the car on ice. Miraculously we slid across the 4 lanes of the highway without hitting another car, and without a car hitting us.

The car slammed into the highway barrier. Airbags deployed but we were fine, other than getting punched in the face with the airbags leaving us bruised and a little bloody.

I was knocked silly and couldn’t think straight. Thomas. That amazing person. He was on top of it. He said something like, “Okay. We’re breathing. We’re both conscious. Nothing is broken. But I’m bleeding. Should I call 911?”

Highway patrol stopped traffic so I could get to the other side of the shoulder as I was facing oncoming traffic on the opposite shoulder.

Once they saw the car was somewhat operable, they escorted me to the mall parking lot where Remsa finished checking us. I was so close to our place, the patrol officer said it was okay to drive the car home.

The car looks absolutely fine from behind. But it is totaled. I had a mechanic come look at it, and it’s not worth it to fix. The front end shifted by about a foot!

I’ve had this car since 2008 – fourteen years! It came into our life when we had been without a car for nearly two years. I had planned on passing it to Thomas this summer. I’ve had to grieve over my plans getting messed up, and now I have to buy a new car. I needed to wait until I had finished paying for Thomas’s orthodontic work, and dental work I’ve been having done.

I had to keep …

January 18 2023

The sky this afternoon. I wonder what tonight’s weather has in store?

Thank you for the loving kindness. I’ve written this sentence many times over the past couple of days. Last night I read a passage in a book I’m re-reading that stood out. I thought I’d share it with you.

“Loving-kindness is bringing happiness to other persons; compassion means relieving their suffering. The key that opens the door to loving-kindness and compassion is our capacity to understand our own suffering and difficulties, and the suffering and difficulties of others.”

I’m deeply grateful to everyone who has shared love, hugs, kind words, and donated. Your loving kindness and compassion mean so very much. Thank you, thank you, thank you. xoxo

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