Happy 13th Birthday My Dearest Thomas and Thomas and Camilla November 2018 Date Day

November 13 2018:

Happy 13th Birthday to Beautiful Thomas!!!! We’ve opened gifts, then taking Thomas out to lunch.

Next stop was Natural Grocers for a special treat and then to Grassroots Books to pick out a book. Then, home for apple pie topped with French vanilla ice cream.

My Dearest Thomas,

A child called Thomas was born
on this day in 2005.
The child arrived about 9:00 at night;
swimming into a new world.

Incredible joy this one
brought along to share.
Smiling, smiling, smiling
a great deal of the time.

A beautiful baby body,
soft as silk, deep with warmth,
and a perfect fit
in this Mom’s arms and heart.

The Mom’s love and support
for the child, Thomas,
runs as deep and wide
as the Universe and beyond.

What the Mom most wants
Thomas to know in the deepest
recesses of the heart ….

You cannot disappoint me,
You are not here to please me
and do as you think I wish.
You do not have to fear
what I will think.
You cannot disappoint me.

This Mom will support you
always and forever,
beyond even the time in
which she is using this body.
This Mom’s love is not
conditioned on who you be or don’t be,
nor what you do or don’t do.
This Mom trusts you.
This Mom believes in you.
This Mom knows you are worthy
of your heart’s desire.
This Mom apologizes for
conditions not being as you
and she deserve.

You cannot disappoint me.
I will love and support you
always and forever …

Happy 13th Birthday Thomas!

I love YOU!!

Now … Let’s make this the
best day of your life …. So far … xoxo

Camilla – Mom 💚💚💚

What Do We Truly Mean When We Say I Love You by Camilla Downs

June 23 2018:

I Love You

What do we truly mean when we say we love and accept another?

Do we love and accept the idea of them?

Do we love and accept them for how they make us feel?


Do we love and accept them for who they know themselves to be?

What do we truly mean when we say we we love and accept another?

Do we mean no matter what you tell me about yourself, my love will ever be there.
Do we mean no matter what you tell me about yourself, I accept you.
Do we mean no matter what you tell me about yourself, you are worthy.


What Do We Truly Mean When We Say I Love You


The Depths of My Love

August 7 2018:

This child knows not the depths of my love. And, that is okay. For I do not have and hold that love for it to be known or reciprocated.

Although there are times when our eyes meet and I Know that Thomas Knows and we Know that the other Knows.

At times, I may fall short of it being clear by way of my words and actions. Yet, it is there, within, where my soul holds it for an eternity, in all times and all dimensions.

It’s been a journey this past 20 years or so of remembering the True meaning of the word Love. I am blessed I get to do it with Thomas and Lillian by my side.

At times, I don’t feel strong enough or capable enough to continue. Yet, in the next moment I know that is simply a trick of the mind. It is only the stories I attach to what I’m experiencing that cause me to feel this way.

This afternoon was for Thomas. May the Love and support I hold for Thomas, and my desire to always make choices that are in Thomas’ highest and best interest, travel far and wide for any and all who feel in need of Love and support.

I’m feeling mushy and woo woo and the Love floweth over … xoxo (photo from July 2018 at Audrey Harris Park)

Fear Alchemized by Camilla Downs

April 2 2018:

Fear Alchemized – Who Will Love Them Unconditionally?

As she took in the message that family means much more than those whom she was born amongst, she felt deep sadness within for having not a close relationship with those whom, by blood, she is connected. A deep sadness also for having not friends or community that are like family.

A sadness that sank and spread to include sadness that her kids know not a close knit relationship with those whom one traditionally calls family …. Go below to read further …

Fear Alchemized – Who Will Love Them Unconditionally?

My Love is Always There


November 30 2013:

The making of homemade gifts has begun! Thomas just wrapped me a box bursting with love … He says there’s so much love in it he had problems taping it! He’s been making gifts all morning since the poor little fella made an inappropriate choice this morning and fibbed about washing his hair. He’s still grasping that this Momma mostly knows when he’s not being truthful.

I had to explain to him that my love for him has nothing to do with whether he tells me the truth or fibs. My love is always there. I explained that he can always tell me the truth … the sky will not fall and the world will not end when he is honest with me.

I explained that it’s his hair. He can choose whether or not to wash it. I will most likely say “Okay” if he chooses not to wash his hair one time and if it continues it will be his choice if he has stinky, dirty hair ….

He was so upset with himself … My heart overflows with love … Sharing the overflow as virtual hugs with all who want or need it … xoxo

Whisperings by Camilla Downs

“Whisperings of the Heart”

The heart whispers secrets
Try not to hear it you do.

Continuing to be in this life’s game
Following the rules, filling out the papers,
conforming to the this-is-the-way-it’s-done norms.
Too busy for interruption
to hear the gentle whisperings of the heart.

Yet, the whisperings never quiet fully.
They are there.
The whisperings are ever delivered
with love and gentleness.

The whisperings of the heart judge not.
The whisperings of the heart
are …..

Go here to read more …

Poetry and Photography: Whisperings of the Heart


Spoken Poetry – The Longest and the Shortest Path By Camilla Downs

September 10 2017:

The Longest and the Shortest Path … Lessons from Nature #2

Still working on location, natural lighting, sound, and other details. Plus, clearing off enough storage so that the video doesn’t stop before I’m finished! The recording stopped right before the last line of the poem so the words are posted along with it.

I don’t have video editing software so …..

Poetry: Spoken Poetry – The Longest and the Shortest Path


Book Musings: Real Love in Parenting

August 26 2017:

So much recommend this book! He also has written “Real Love” (which is a great one too) and a novel titled, “Under the Bridge”. Thomas absolutely loved Under the Bridge. It spoke to him deeply!

I also just recently wrote a blog post titled, “The One Thing We Should Be Teaching” … Excerpt ” …. Over the past several months I’ve had a couple of friends ask how homeschooling is going. Without any thought, I answered through my heart with this, “We are learning how to be …. ” 

The One Thing We Should Be Teaching

Excerpt from “Real Love in Parenting” by Greg Baer, M.D. …

“It’s strange, don’t you think, that we go to such great lengths to instruct our children in subjects that most of them will never use ….. and yet we teach them nothing about the one subject – relationships – they will use every day?

Our children are not taught what human beings need most. They don’t understand how relationships work, and then we wonder why they become frustrated and angry. We wonder why they join gangs, why they can’t keep a job, why the jails are full, why more than half of all marriages fail, why people shake their fists at one another on the road, why children are abused and neglected, why relationships seem to come and go like falling leaves, why newspapers are filled with accounts of violence and war, and so on. There’s no mystery in any of this. All these things are guaranteed to happen when we don’t teach our children the basic principles of love and relationships.”

Real Love in Parenting Book 2017

The One Lesson I Prioritize

July 7 2017:

This has been Thomas’ first year of homeschooling and Lillian’s third or fourth year. The style of schooling we follow is more like unschooling, interest based, or child-led learning. It’s definitely not traditional homeschooling. Over the past several months I’ve had a couple of friends ask how homeschooling is going. Without any thought, I answered through my heart with this, “We are learning how to be kind humans and how to have healthy relationships.” [ 651 more words ]

The One Thing We Should Be Teaching


How Do You Let Your True Colors Shine

May 29 2017:

Fear ~~ Control ~~ Manipulation ~~ Conditional Love ~~ Smallness ~~ Victim These six have been my friends throughout this life. I unconsciously believed they were my protectors, my power, and what allowed me to live this life as I thought I wanted to experience it. In December 2016, I had an intuitive knowing that the year 2017 would bring with it a… [ 532 more words ]

One Way I Surrendered To My True Colors